The ThinkTank Chronicles.

This is my journey from the deeply mysterious to the outrageously silly and mundace happenings of my life. the lows and highs, the ups and downs. And maybe a Simple Harmonic Motion to an exponential curve. Mathematical, Scientific, Theistic, Philosophical, Logical,Social, every conceivable idea.

Monday, April 04, 2005

truly american and beautiful

american beauty - movie

The most beautiful scene is definitely the scene about the plastic cover that keeps swirling in the wind, as if it an eternal dance, just flowing, not with the self-conscious grace, but that of an entranced lyrics that just flow with the music.

flicked this from the movie script hosted at http://www.dailyscript.com/scripts/AmericanBeauty_final.html

I guess I could be pretty pissed off about what happened to me... but it's hard to stay mad, when there's so much beauty in the world. Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much, my heart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst...

...and then I remember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it, and then it flows through me like rain and I can't feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life...

You have no idea what I'm talking about, I'm sure. But don't worry...

You will someday

Why im writing this? The magic of the movie for one and another, the emotions and nostalgia hit you hard for things you havent done, things you should have, but were afterall doing other things, and now wondering how come that i dont have memories of them? Its not the missing of the moments with my friends that concerns me, what frightens me is if i had really bungled up real bad that im trying to think what made me happy during those times,frightening the living daylights hell out of me when asking myself if what i have of me till now is just a untold invisible legacy...The rush of emotions that hit me made me speak words not to be spoken.

And when we cool down, we know one lesson. And as my dearest friend L~ said "If you gain something you lose something". Something as simple she said, guess she didnt understand how prophetic it was for me.

For all the nostalgia they had, i had something else and i guess i can squander it just like that by telling it here, can i? ;) wink, wink

PS:the phreak speaks
|| KoPoS, 3:42:00 PM

2 Comments:

When you begin to think about it - The whole of your life is just described by one moment - the present...

The unperfected talent in living life - is living in the present. There are a few who can do this always, and then there are those who can do this most of the times - and then there are many who cannot bring themselves to stop talking about things in the past - mostly negative and unfortunately forget how things are ever-changing and even personalities change. That in fact puts certain things like punishment for wrong deeds in a big loop...

In an ever-changing world - what is the wisdom in longing for something that is gone? Anyway, the point I am trying to make is - Nostalgia is not necessarily a good thing. Nost-past; Algium - Pain. That being what it is, why be masochistic about something painful?

I could relate a lot to your post - though I am a easy victim to nostalgia of my early childhood, I have had no trouble forgetting most of the things that my friends say I did or I saw - say - in the last ten years. Something I really wonder - how does that happen?

Have I sub-consciously learnt that life is all about letting go? Or is it something that happens to everybody beyond a point?
Blogger Woodworm, at 7:30 PM  
Thank god there's atleast someone like me. I always thought i was a freak :) Freak or not atleast there is someone who shares the thoughts as i do.

The Brotherlyhood bonding definitely helps.

Thanks RL ;)
Blogger KoPoS, at 10:15 AM  

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