The ThinkTank Chronicles.

This is my journey from the deeply mysterious to the outrageously silly and mundace happenings of my life. the lows and highs, the ups and downs. And maybe a Simple Harmonic Motion to an exponential curve. Mathematical, Scientific, Theistic, Philosophical, Logical,Social, every conceivable idea.

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

'Policemen have too much power'

This is in reference to an article with the same title.

Yes,what happened in Mumbai was absolutely wrong. The laws too are archaic. But making sweeping statements as this is, i guess i had to vent my views.

A society thats completely narcisstic of itself, we never seem to understand or even try make an attempt what the life of a soldier or a police man is made of. We talk of crime growing in the city but never care about who constitute this force. None of us "the educated class" will go into the forces. We are overqualified to do such jobs. So lets keep the mouths shut unless we really do something about it. Lets stop making sweeping statements, that incriminates all the guys who are doing such a good work, the jawans in the colds and the policemen maintaining law and order.

I for myself cannot think[or dream?] of leaving this plush job for joining the army, would i?

Of police being killed in encounters, of soldiers being killed daily, but we never understand that for every soldier killed, there's a family rendered helpless.

And that soldier/policeman was not killed, mind you, in his own self defense; but for some stranger sleeping happily in their cozy beds unaware of everything; the strangers, you and me.

I see hundreds of people riding on the road without proper licenses and then suddenly talk of rules and inequality, only when caught.

Any comments?
|| KoPoS, 9:13:00 PM || link || (9) comments |

Thursday, April 21, 2005

the call

When I didnt greet you in the morning,
I thought you would call.
When i didnt return your greeting,
I thought you would call.
When i slept without eating,
I thought you would call.
When i was crying while sleeping,
I thought you would call.
When i was reading the mails you wrote me,
I thought you would call.
When i was feeling alone among the crowd,
I thought you would call.

When i wished i wanted to live no more,
I wished you would call.
|| KoPoS, 3:11:00 PM || link || (2) comments |

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

understand

another good forward i got by email

A store owner was tacking a sign above his door that read: "Puppies For Sale". Signs like that have a way of attracting small children and sure enough, a little boy appeared under the store owner's sign.

"How much are you going to sell the puppies for?" he asked.

The store owner replied, "Anywhere from $30 to $50."

The little boy reached in his pocket and pulled out some change.

"I have $2.37," he said. "Can I please look at them?"

The store owner smiled and whistled and out of the kennel came Lady, who ran out in the aisle of his store followed by five teeny, tiny balls of fur. One puppy was lagging considerably behind.

Immediately the little boy singled out the lagging, limping puppy and said, "What's wrong with that little dog?"

The store owner explained that the veterinarian had examined the little puppy and had discovered it didn't have a hip socket. It would always be lame.

The little boy became excited. "That is the puppy that I want to buy."

The store owner said, "No, you don't want to buy that little dog. If you really want him, I'll just give him to you."

The little boy got quite upset. He looked straight into the store owner's eyes, pointing his finger, and said, "I don't want you to give him to me. That little dog is worth every bit as much as all the other dogs and I'll pay full price. In fact, I'll give you $2.37 now, and 50 cents a month until I have him paid for."

The store owner countered, "You really don't want to buy this little dog. He is never going to be able to run and jump and play with you like the other puppies."

To his surprise, the little boy reached down and rolled up his pant leg to reveal a badly twisted, crippled left leg supported by a big metal brace. He looked up at the store owner and softly replied, "Well, I don't run so well myself, and the little puppy will need someone who understands."

Don't we all need someone who understands?
|| KoPoS, 10:20:00 AM || link || (4) comments |

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

My 2 paise..1

I am an avid fan of Ayn Rand. But not anymore. I like the characters she shows, the inherent power in them, the way they deal with situations ... but as always there is this ominous but.

D~ : Why dont you like Ayn Rand?
P~ : Well, as i said its not i dont like Ayn Rand. Ive just grown over her philosophy. Her philosophy doesnt appear so appealing anymore.
D~ : But you used to like her right?
P~ : But i guess i grew out of that. I found that there are many discrepancies in her philosophy.
D~ : What!!?
P~ : Yeah, there are many things i cannot agree with her in her philosophy. Its her unilateral opposition to the state or any hierarchy. It resounds too much of her own personal hatred towards socialism and communism. Her own miseries appearing, overtly glorifying capitalism. Its almost like every problem with the woman is because of the patriarchy and the hierarchy. Some things are with a good intent man.
D~ : Hmmm...
P~ : Its her unilateral view that she takes of any State or Authority as evil in intent. That i cannot accept. Or her idea of everything weak as moochers. Its her view of anything weak or the state as evil in intent that i unsettles me. Many times its not the intent that is evil, but its the effect that is.
D~ : Speak on
P~ : Its just a method of saying that Indira Gandhi was the harbinger of corruption. Im not aware of completely of everything, but i would try giving her a benefit of doubt atleast for hypothesizing. Ill blame her because even she might not be the one responsible, i would need someone to point to. Its like when i speak of 'I', 'I' is not this body, but for all practical purposes, i would have to relate 'I' with my body.
D~ : Ok...
P~ : Anything is never necessarily evil in intent, but its the effect that is. The solution is to change as per the time, to change keeping in mind, that the spirit is intact and not the rule...
D~ : Whooooff! Greats session man. Good enough for the day.
|| KoPoS, 6:54:00 PM || link || (5) comments |

When heuristics become rules

"He calls her by her name?!!!" shrieked mom, about my cousin's friend who calls his mom by name.
"Yeah" spaketh my cousin
"Whats wrong with that?" i chip in
"Its wrong" decided mom
"Its not. Theres nothing wrong" I affirm strongly
"Would you call your dad by name?" she said as if scoring a point
"Yeah we would have, if we had been taught us to do so. If we were accustomed to it, we surely would have" chipped in my bro along with me.
"Yeah right" I added
"No no no. Thats blasphemy. You should not call your parents by their names.Children have no respect for their parents" telling me as if it was a horrnedous crime.
"So you mean to say someone who calls their dad by NannaGaaruAndi[approximates to PapaSirJi] had more respect for their parents than him?" i ask
"Thats respect" mom says almost understanding the point i raise
"Ma, love & respect is to be felt, not defined by how you address(them)" i end it.

Just kept me thinking, how dangerous things can get if we stop thinking.Mom had a point, but iron casing her point was what made the whole situation mercurially inflammable. IronCasing simple situations.

---
Very distantly related but Too lazy to post it separately
---
Whats strikes me is how people generally are judegemental. Or satisfy their need to be judgemental at every passing moment. The innate urge to not being able to stay non-judgemental, passing the judgements, comparing everything to our situation and vice-versa, the "percieved" need to stay competivite/comparative.

The innate urge to think and believe that we are the center of the world; the fact that all that we will finally amount to is just a speck of dust and that all we have for ourselves is only us.

Me for me.
|| KoPoS, 6:32:00 PM || link || (0) comments |

Monday, April 18, 2005

A True Kodak Moment

I have stories of people[read bloggers] telling ingenious ways they found to double cross the incessant calls they get from the banks like Standard Chartered, ICICI, and others for taking the credit cards.

My own simple way is to end it as soon as possible. So i just say I have one. Today was no different. But what came after that definitely was.

Today she[its most generally a she] asked me if i have any friends that i could refer.

10/10 for the worst escapade ever. "Hmm...most of my collegues are on leave, and i sit on the far end of the cubicle". How more tongue tied can one get?

LoL. A true kodak moment oopsie a panasonic moment.
|| KoPoS, 6:05:00 PM || link || (0) comments |

Friday, April 15, 2005

Top 20 replies

Top 20 replies by Programmers to Testers when their programs don't work:

20. "That's weird..."
19. "It's never done that before."
18. "It worked yesterday."
17. "How is that possible?"
16. "It must be a hardware problem."
15. "What did you type in wrong to get it to crash?"
14. "There is something funky in your data."
13. "I haven't touched that module in weeks!"
12. "You must have the wrong version."
11. "It's just some unlucky coincidence."
10. "I can't test everything!"
9. "THIS can't be the source of THAT."
8. "It works, but it hasn't been tested."
7. "Somebody must have changed my code."
6. "Did you check for a virus on your system?"
5. "Even though it doesn't work, how does it feel?
4. "You can't use that version on your system."
3. "Why do you want to do it that way?"
2. "Where were you when the program blew up?"
And the Number One Reply by Programmers when their programs don't work:

"It works on my machine"

:)

*Not my creation. All standard disclaimers apply and i havent read the fine print*
|| KoPoS, 10:56:00 AM || link || (0) comments |

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

goosebumps

I think we need to talk.
|| KoPoS, 5:53:00 PM || link || (2) comments |

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

love is ...

"That's what love is all about," she later told me. "He gave me all he had, wrote the words he best knew how to spell, prepared the only food he knew how to prepare. I'm not nearly as alone as I was feeling that evening. I have a wonderful son who loves me."
|| KoPoS, 2:25:00 PM || link || (0) comments |

Thursday, April 07, 2005

an encounter

"Accha, aap Mussalmaan hai na?" i asked.

"Haan saab" he said. He, an old man which i could understand by his voice and a wizened man which i understood from his words. He must be atleast 50 years old, i could estimate which i remember from his frail figure which i dont exactly remember, as he asked for lift just 5 minutes ago.

"To aapko Urdu to aata hogaa naa?" It was just two day ago i had talked to the boy named Kaleem at the bike repair shop when my tire had gone bust; and he told me that he daily gets up at 6 to learn Urdu under a maulvi though he had stopped schooling since his 6th class. The boy couldnt tell me what the meaning of his name was.

"Hou. aata saab"

"Accha to 'Kaleem' ka kuch matlab hota kya?"

"Kaleem to bacche kaa naam hota"

"Haan. Nai mein yeh bolra thaa Ki ... akbar bole to great, nai? Tho isi tarah Kaleem ka kuch to matlab hota naa"

"Nai saab kuch nai hota" he said. Im still not convinced that it could not have a meaning.

"Aapko kahan jaana hai?"

"Madhapur saab. Aaj tankhwa milegaa naa...Wahaan pe " Yeah the need for money that so acutely comes up for them regularly at the beginning of every month. Its not dispensible.

"Ok kahin ATM pe chod doon aapko?"

"Haan wahan madhapur mein chod do"

"theek hai"

And we kept talking. And finally i remembered i had taken a wrong turn. The one that would have me to take a longer route and a bit away from his destination. I could go on my way but i would not be able to drop him at that place, it would be a good half a km away from his destination now.

It was such a worse thing to do and that which i hated; to do a job but to do it bad. I was cursing myself all the way.
"Uh oh. Lagta hain maine doosra turn le liye. Wahaan se jaana tha na. Aapko wahin chod detaaa"
"Arre no problem saab. Aapne yahan tak laaya yahi bahut kuch hai"

I was feeling pretty bad abt the mixup but i dropped him. And then he did a small bow with the ubiquitous wave of his hand and said "Thank you saab. Alla aapko dua de"

I couldnt help but feel elated.
|| KoPoS, 5:44:00 PM || link || (2) comments |

cursorily glanced ... 2

The love of posterity is a consequence of the necessity of death. If a man were sure of living forever here, he would not care about his offspring. — NATHANIEL HAWTHORNE
|| KoPoS, 3:39:00 PM || link || (0) comments |

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

Religion. Post Count ++

These are my small comments and thoughts wrt to the ones shared here. This is just a mirror of the comments i put in there. Nothing more nothing less.

"When a religion begins to directly assualt social problems as targets, that is probably when it is time to quit that religion"

Religion at every outset tries to answer some painfully seething but logical questions every man tries to find answers for. What is he/she? Whats his/her identity? Why are they here for? How will their existence through the 50-60 years of their own life make any difference to anyone?

I guess trying to tell a full grown human that he was born of a broken condom might not be the best way to placate the individual's ego :)

Its the need for identity, the fear of anonymity and the fear of insignificance are some of the very minor issues every creature with a knowledge of self has to deal with. As true as it can be, it is very clear that an individual has no role to play, he is but a speck of dust in the whole universe.

Its the answers to this identity crisis, that religions try to give a meaning to; to his own ego, that a religion tries to answer.

Hinduism as i understand tries to give an answer to everyone[based on their own individual capabilities] at every level. It tries to provide the required flexibility and also the required rigidity that can provide answers to questions that one poses. Its like the question bank that gives answers based on the questions we ask it. In this mode of generality, neither crystallinity nor fluidity can be its hallmarks.

Its fairly impossible to understand as how many can understand the basic philosophical premise that all they do might amount to nothing. They are as insignificant as any speck of dust can be. As tough it can be, it should also try to mask it with a belief of existence, of their own individual importance; of self-realisation.

What is the need for man to grow? Whats the need for spirituality, whats the need for a man to say he belongs to creatures of one kind, based on color, or geography or some belief systems? The sense of belonging is innate to every individual and hence the grouping based on the thought process[belief systems, i mean] might be biggest umbrella under which the most number of people can fit in, in a given scenario on earth. Any other system definitely becomes a subset of this [sex, geography, skin color]. The biggest superset is that of belonging to human race, and the bigger to that is that of all living systems. But i guess the religious system of Hinduism includes each and every being as an extension of an individual where the border between and individual and the environment they inhabit diminishes as he begins to probe deeper as per his own knowledge and understanding.

Also hinduism also tries to answer this by giving the man his individual place under the sun; to deal with his own life.

Im sure i havent told atleast one thing that relates to your post; and so am eagerly waiting for the philosopher's stone you are speaking about.
|| KoPoS, 11:19:00 AM || link || (2) comments |

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

a great short story

A great short story i would like to read someday. I dont know Tamil yet.Raises lot of other questions but the beauty is in this very story itself.

It is the story of a young woman, a victim of sexual seduction, who could in the normal course have been destroyed by trauma and guilt. Instead, she is ceremonially cleansed by her mother who sprinkles Ganga water over her and proclaims her “pure and untainted”. The young woman presumably overcomes her sense of shame and victimisation and goes on to lead a happy, harmonious life.

The first thing that comes to mind after reading this is Ramayana, isnt it? Anyways, the name of this short story is Agnipravesham.
|| KoPoS, 4:46:00 PM || link || (2) comments |

Monday, April 04, 2005

Linux on CD

Tried two Linux-on-CD versions yesterday. Knoppix and Morphix. Though ive heard a lot about Knoppix, Morphix is relatively new to me. And it definitely did blow me out!

Knoppix had this KDE3.1 gui and Morphix had the Xfce. Since Ive already been hooked on to Xfce, the minimalist design and the speed it provides, i guess i could say i got hooked onto Morphix soon and with that matrix style boot, how can a matrix-geek like me not like it?

I mean just think of the wonderful things it can do. You have a fresh pc, no parititions, nothing and you want to first test whichOS you want to have on your PC. Just push the required CD in and voila you already have a pc loaded... Or if you are outside and have never worked in anything else other than linux. So take the windows box, put in your CD and you can happily live in your own linux world. Coooool B-)

It was one hell of a fun.
|| KoPoS, 4:37:00 PM || link || (0) comments |

truly american and beautiful

american beauty - movie

The most beautiful scene is definitely the scene about the plastic cover that keeps swirling in the wind, as if it an eternal dance, just flowing, not with the self-conscious grace, but that of an entranced lyrics that just flow with the music.

flicked this from the movie script hosted at http://www.dailyscript.com/scripts/AmericanBeauty_final.html

I guess I could be pretty pissed off about what happened to me... but it's hard to stay mad, when there's so much beauty in the world. Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much, my heart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst...

...and then I remember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it, and then it flows through me like rain and I can't feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life...

You have no idea what I'm talking about, I'm sure. But don't worry...

You will someday

Why im writing this? The magic of the movie for one and another, the emotions and nostalgia hit you hard for things you havent done, things you should have, but were afterall doing other things, and now wondering how come that i dont have memories of them? Its not the missing of the moments with my friends that concerns me, what frightens me is if i had really bungled up real bad that im trying to think what made me happy during those times,frightening the living daylights hell out of me when asking myself if what i have of me till now is just a untold invisible legacy...The rush of emotions that hit me made me speak words not to be spoken.

And when we cool down, we know one lesson. And as my dearest friend L~ said "If you gain something you lose something". Something as simple she said, guess she didnt understand how prophetic it was for me.

For all the nostalgia they had, i had something else and i guess i can squander it just like that by telling it here, can i? ;) wink, wink

PS:the phreak speaks
|| KoPoS, 3:42:00 PM || link || (2) comments |

men and women. or women and men is it?

this was something i got in the mailbox. quite touching and true.

By the time the Lord made woman, he was into his Sixth day of working overtime. An Angel appeared and said, "Why are you spending so much time on this one?" And the Lord answered and said, "Have you seen the specification sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have 200 movable parts, all replaceable, run on black coffee and leftovers, have a lap that can hold two children at one time and that disappears when she stands up, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart, and have six pairs of hands."

The Angel was astounded at the requirements for this one. "Six pairs of hands! No Way!" said the Angel. The Lord replied, "Oh, it's not the hands that are the problem. It's the three pairs of eyes that others must have!" "And that's just on the standard model?" The Angel asked.

The Lord nodded in agreement. "Yep, one pair of eyes is to see through the closed door as she asks her childre! n what they are doing even though she already knows. Another pair in the back of her head is to see what she needs to know even though no one thinks she can. And the third
pair is here in the front of her head. They are for looking at an errant child and saying that she understands and loves him or her without even saying a single word." The Angel tried to stop the Lord. "This is too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish." "But, I can't!" The Lord protested, "I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick. AND can feed a family on a pound of hamburger and can get a nine year old to stand in the shower." The Angel moved closer and touched the woman,
"But you have made her so soft, Lord." "She is soft," Lord agreed, "but I have also made her tough. You have no idea what she can endure oraccomplish." "Will she be able to think? ", asked the Angel. The Lord replied, "Not only will she be able ! to think, she will be able to reason, and negotiate." The Angel then noticed something and reached out and touched the woman's cheek.

"Oops, it looks like you have a leak with this model. I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one." "That's not a leak." The Lord objected. "That's a tear!" "What's the tear for?" the Angel asked. The Lord said, "The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her loneliness, her grief, and her pride." The Angel was impressed.

"You are a genius, Lord. You thought of everything, for women are truly amazing." Women have strengths that amaze men. They carry children, they carry hardships, they carry burdens but they hold happiness, love and joy. They smile when they want to scream. They sing when they want to cr! y. They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous. They fight for what they believe in. They stand up for injustice. They don't take "no" for an answer, when they believe! there is a better solution. They go without new shoes so their children can have them. They go to the doctor with a frightened friend. They love unconditionally. They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards. Their hearts break when a friend dies. They have sorrow at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left. They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart. Women come in all sizes, in all colors and shapes. They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you. The heart of a woman is what makes the world spin! Women do more than just give birth. They bring joy and hope. They give compassion and ideals. Wom! en have a lot to say and a lot to give.

Pass it along to your women friends to remind them how amazing they are.

but after going through it and the reactions i got, i thought it was time a tribute to the darker sex was also drafted. and thus was this answer to it.
This mail might make some of us look like MCPs but then who cares. Just
read on. Took a lot of time to write but well prolly worth the effort,
finally... :)

How God made man?
===================
When God was making man, he was one day approached by a group of angels with a
specification sheet to make a person just like him but also to see that he was
more human and could fit into the scheme of things and animals on earth!

God started reading the specification sheet and said, "Are you nuts? What is
this that you want me to make?" The angels told to him in unison, "We want him to
be completely strong and durbale. He shall be strong enough to take any pains
or wounds for himself but should be delicate enough to teach his children to
walk without hurting their little fingers."

"He shall be tough and extremely cold towards himself and his pains but warm
enough to hug his sweetheart in the raging cold and provide her succor. His
heart
shall be strong and tough without any fears and full of courage, but a small
tear in the eyes of his lady will kill him quick"

God asked "Is that it?"

The angels anwered "Oh! Not Yet! we are just getting started."

"His wallet must be huge like his heart. And he must be silly and stupid. He
must buy a diamond necklace to his pouting wife only to get a simple "I Love
You" in return. And a brand new Ford Mustang to his children who are just out
of college even though he cant afford a new pair of shoes"

"He must act tough with his children to make them grow up to be tough,
disciplined and self-respecting. And then for the rest of his life he must
bear the brunt of this with his own children who think he is just a nutty
ole' man"

"He must be able to sustain himself on nothings to high-fat foods of burgers
and pizzaz and keep up with endless streams of depression and stress. He must
not cry whatever the reason and then should not even think about going home as
he has to send his son/daughter to the university and buy a house for them"

"He must be endowed with telepathic powers and see that he can understand
everything his lady thinks about in her mind even though she might be silent
about it.And then in the final stages of his life when everyone thinks him to
be just an antique piece item with no practicality he should be a silent
recluse and keep up with ridicule"

"He must mend himself when his heart is broken and then must start to begin
his life afresh. And then he must silly enough to go on his knees to ask the
hand of the woman he loves even though he might be the president. And then
they must be stupid enough to believe in their dreams and work relentlessly
for it as though their life is as stake. Though the world might believe in
them or not they shall live with their dreams and then rest in their
graves with satisfaction."

And finally spake god "And for all this he shall pay with his life sooner
then others"

ps: no flames please :)
|| KoPoS, 12:26:00 PM || link || (2) comments |

Friday, April 01, 2005

narcissism

ÞÕÕ®ñä §hå§håñKÅ
|| KoPoS, 11:05:00 AM || link || (5) comments |

Life's like that :)

cursorily glanced.

Life is like having a cup of tea. You sit by the side of the window, lift the cup and take a careless sip, only to realize, somebody forgot to put the sugar. Too lazy to go for it you somehow struggle through the sugarless cup. Till you discover undissolved sugar crystal sitting at the bottom...
|| KoPoS, 10:17:00 AM || link || (2) comments |

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